How did you become a Rational Satanist?
I am Native American (Ojibway/Cree) and I currently reside on an isolated reservation in the northwestern part of Ontario, Canada. Though, I took up the title of Satanist, I did not always follow my chosen philosophy. Making mistakes and fully knowing the possibility of the consequences that would follow from making these decisions.
About 6 years ago, I got stabbed in the side of the neck, the blade made it’s way through my spine, severing most of my spinal cord. I was paralysed from the neck down. They could not simply stitch the wound up, as spinal fluid was spraying out. They had to drain my spinal fluid every 4 hours for a month via spinal tap in my lower spine.
My initial thought was, “How can I end myself?” I thought of who would do me the favour of relieving me of the hell that was in my head, I even thought of chewing my tongue out in the middle of the night…but that would not work, as they had to drain every 4 hours.
It wasn’t until the doctors told me that I was never to walk again, that something inside me stirred. In that moment, I replied, “Fuck you, watch me.” I no longer take things for granted, even down to the simple movement of a finger. Life is too short to worry about negative occurrences. The day I have, solely depends on myself.
Have you recovered completely from the incident?
No, I have not recovered completely. I have nerve damage and can’t feel about 40% of my body, which throws stamina out the window for physical activities. I go through chronic pain daily, from the stabbing to the spine, and also from the spinal tap that they did to drain my spinal fluid.
It was Will that drove me to push myself, learning to walk again was by far the hardest thing I’ve ever had to accomplish. I guess you can say it was the Rational Satanist inside me that gave me the motivation to walk again. I don’t think on how to be a Rational Satanist, I just am. I don’t know how else to be.
For me personally, It’s true freedom at its finest. Even before I heard of the Church of Rational Satanism, I was a Rational Satanist. I require the same Will daily to work, I find it empowering every single morning I walk to work, I contemplate on what I went through I should be on disability receiving monthly cheques, but I would rather work for a living. I’m not down for the count.
What are your family’s attitude toward your beliefs?
I actually don’t know how they feel about my chosen path, I’ve never discussed that with my family. I’m sure that they’re not overjoyed, frankly, they probably don’t care at all.
I rarely discuss my personal beliefs, as they fit into my subjective view (10%, irrational thought) on matters of magic, ritual, and the metaphysical. So, I would not discuss these things with family. I know that most of them have no understanding on what Satanism is, nor would I want them to. This is a personal choice of mine, I don’t require them to understand.
As a Native American, the teachings of my people held a closer resonance than other teachings I came across. The thing was, I saw these teachings as weak, and needed my philosophy to be self-serving.
I took LaVey’s system and used the teachings (The 7 Grandfather Teachings) as a palate to devise my own philosophy. I came across The Church of Rational Satanism via Facebook in the fall of 2013. I had not heard of CoRS prior to requesting membership to the Facebook group.
That is where I found and adopted the concept of 90% 10% critical thinking. It is a concept any Satanist can utilise, whether they are atheistic, pantheistic, or theistic (and everything in between). I am a Rational Satanist, my personal beliefs are my business.